An old dog putters out each step the same way it did when it was a puppy. Each of the four legs stepping. His head is gray and he has a beard. He reminds me of a hermit from the libraries and the encyclopedias of what it means to be man's best friend. His master follows near. This is the fifth time he has taken him outside. He walks ahead, but just barely, and looks back even before the leash pulls tight. Man's only friend. The two walk in solitude together. Speaking by staying near and never letting go until the dog is safe to run in whatever direction it pleases. Dog's best friend. The animal kingdom must have a heaven, and where ever it is, nobody receives respect like an old dog. An old dog has more friends then there are names for these friends. Made up quests have kept it moving, breeding with the world's aromas and feeling of grass. There is nothing like the smell of a dead animal to role around in. Maybe if it's a dear there will be a bone to show off back at the house. The neighbors started cleaning their kills in the woods next to our house. When we were kids we would go back their and declare it holy ground and talk about the other creatures that protected the bones we found. It seemed they have landed thereout of thin air. Shadow would find them and bring them into the yard. Usually barreling them into the dirt to be discovered on a uneventful day, as far as dog days go, no one to chase, too old to bark, and he would find them again. A small victory rediscovering the soul of another animal, the soul of a memory. Most the times the bones no longer smell after they have been buried for a while. The micro organisms in the ground get all the smell off. They use the smell and turn it into dirt. A lot of animals live off bad smells. I think my brother is one of them. Shadow didn't have much time left and that was the saddest part of my father. I once heard parents sometimes bought pets when there kids were young so they could learn about death when the pet died. I never thought that seemed nice. There are enough things disappear or change so much it would have been best to have lost altogether. A pet leaving is hard for anyone. I never heard why adults buy pets beside that. To keep them company I guess. I wonder how many adults buy a new pet when the kids leave for life. Probably a few. Women get those small talker dogs and their husbands fall in love even though when they themselves were kids they had always wanted a big animal. But why did adults buy dogs when they know they were going to die sometime. It wouldn't be anything like watching a person die, would it? I sometimes wonder if its worse. Most animals don't know what we are saying. They teach about love. We love dogs because they don't get busy saying many things unless they are important. Barking at the neighbors all the time or wanting to go outside for no other reason than to come back indoors. I am sad that my dad watched our dog die, he had to see his dad die later, and his mom is old. She is beautiful old. She touches life in every way. I don't want her to go because I don't want my dad to loose his first mom, his only mom. She doesn't believe in computers and will never see this. I am scared of these things happening. I don't want to see him cry unless he is happy, I am so scared to watch him die, more scared because he is only smiles and the world needs mores smiles. He has so many he could make up for all the people that are sad for no reason. I guess everyone has their reasons, but most i don't understand.  He could tell them their mouth turns both ways.

Why is the world so painful. I will never understand why things have to be so good that we never want to loose them.